Monday, December 01, 2008

rays and wind....




I just came back Sunday from a much needed 3 day silent retreat at a beautiful place....
a place situated right in the middle of a forest...
the above photos were taken on my last day of retreat...
I'm no photographer but really glad to be able to capture those rays,
to be standing there at the right time....
so beautiful...
God's works are!
Hope you will enjoy these photos....

Did this dandelion illustration to accompany Jennifer's (J R Poulter) poem, Dandelion Down....
started sketching while waiting to depart from church to the retreat place...continued during one of my break time....and finished it Sunday evening.....
thanks Jennifer for inviting me to illustrate for your poem.
You can read this poem and many others here.

i still cannot decide...

Tuesday, October 07, 2008

strays....


some sketches..
while i contemplate on the fate of this blog...
thanks Anna and Shayla :)



Friday, October 03, 2008

What comes freely....



i have allowed myself to stray again today
should be illustrating something else
but when i woke up this morning
i was determined
to allow myself to be myself...
and let the hand express itself freely today...
and so,
here she is....
colour pencil, pastel and a bit of digital dots for the flowers on her hair....
......

I really feel that i should start afresh again...
should i start a new blog?
There are too many sadness here...
i'm sorry that I've been a very 'melancholic' blogger....
but this is how i really am...
....


Monday, September 15, 2008

The rain brought me back today...



the rain today
brought me back here...

Thursday, July 31, 2008

till we next meet......



i don't know what to do, my dear friends...
neither here nor there am i...

so, i'll take a little break
and decide what to do later....

thank you my friends, for always being there...
Hugs!



Monday, July 28, 2008

untitled failure.....




i don't know why should i continue...
fooling myself....
perhaps, a goodbye for this blog is coming soon.....

Tuesday, July 15, 2008

Monday, June 30, 2008

..........


...................


Friday, June 20, 2008

Hoard for IF - repost


close friends and family know that i'm a woman that hoards
vintage/antique stuff like old books, posters, coloured bottles/glasses, etc...
because I really, really like such things...
because of this, they appear in my sketches/illustrations as well :)

Hope you like this sketch...

Tuesday, June 17, 2008

a sketch for nothing...

well...just a sketch...first time doing the hair this way...

Thursday, June 12, 2008

organising thoughts in black and white....



i went back late last night....after class
i did stray a bit again, but this time, not as much as i did in the previous lecture...
will share that stray with you another day...
but last night,
i couldn't sleep...till almost 2am...
so i sat there in the hall, taking photos of items on my desk...
while trying not to think of certain matters
some of the past that has resurfaced, in some ways...
some of the present, that i'm in doubt of still...
and off course, some of the future...
that seemed rather 'unpromising' as far as i'm concerned...
and i finally got to bed and slept off....
when suddenly, my mobile rang...it was a message tone...
a message from a friend at 4am...
that gave me a shocking news...
of which i never thought would happen to him...although there were signs already, but still i wasn't expecting the news i got....
no, it's not death...but, it is death in some ways...a very heart wrenching one...
and then, i couldn't get back to sleep until after a while...
....

i know this post seemed to be hanging...
i guess, i'm just reorganizing my thoughts
in black and white for now...





Sunday, June 08, 2008

Back to straying...



i was in class the other evening...
listening to the lecture...
on ADHD...
the lecturer's voice was so soothing...
so gentle...
that it lulled me to another world....
and when i 'came back' to class
a 'visitor'
appeared
on my notes....
peeking cheekily
over the texts
perhaps
she's wondering too,
how did she arrive there...
right in between paragraphs....

....

perhaps, i too, have a bit of a problem here....
.....


Re-Post for IF's Forgotten...


they shall not be forgotten....

for the victims of the recent earthquake in China....




Monday, May 19, 2008

In need of a brighter place....


it's been a little dark in my world lately...
perhaps, i should start looking for another place to stay
and rent out or sell my own apartment...
....

how i long for windows...
those that runs from floor to ceiling kind....
oh, how i long for those....

when it is bright and sunny
I will put empty wine bottles, perfume bottles even,
on the floor and let the beam shines through them

when it rains
i'll just sit by it
with a mug of hot coffee
and let the shadows from the raindrops on the window pane
run down my face...

oh, how i long for those windows...


Tuesday, May 13, 2008

finally....the shop is up....


My shop is up :)
one for now....will add more later...
.........


Thursday, May 01, 2008

Monday, April 21, 2008

Excuse me today....



a little blue today...

(a song i like very much, introduced to me by a friend, that i found on youtube...)

Thursday, April 17, 2008

If my heart insists....


i should be giving something else my full attention,
at least until next Wednesday
but.....
well, i just have to release this...


Monday, April 07, 2008

Save for IF


it's a rough and quick one, this one...hope you don't mind my handwriting..
for IF and for those of us who are still very young at heart :)
(do click on the image to have a larger view)


Thursday, April 03, 2008

Antique-ly Modern?


it is odd...
i don't really know how to read chinese but, most of the books on my table
are in chinese, but what's even more odd is that, i do understand them...most of the time...
and i teach sunday class in Mandarin too...
....
I've re-positioned my work area again...
I'm quite happy with it this time...
only, maybe it's a bit too dark...
i think i need a table lamp with white lighting :)

and this, is my 2nd illustration since re-positioning...



Monday, March 31, 2008

Homage...IF



She smiles
in crowded places now
but when nobody is in sight
and when alone at night
she writes tributes
she writes homages
of the love that did not survive
and sends them up
to the stars
in the sky...
before whispering
goodnight
to the shadows
of her past....


Monday, March 24, 2008

It takes time....




I cannot believe still
that I have left
and already walking the opposite direction
....
i guess it takes time
...
it is time to part the curtains
so that the beams can come in
and chase
my 'last-nights' away...


Saturday, March 22, 2008

Wednesday, March 19, 2008

Farewell to Corporate World...


This is what i did a few years ago...
she is leaving...
going somewhere...

somewhere nobody knows,
not even herself...
.....

it is time for another chapter of my life....

a totally un-corporate chapter of my life...
to be myself...
and to try to live a more meaningful life...

will you accompany me?


Saturday, March 08, 2008

Gaze/Garden for IF


when i saw this week's topic, i immediately thought of this...
posted this before but not in IF....


Tuesday, February 26, 2008

looking for a mentor...

i have not forgotten
this other part of me
or
maybe
this is me
entirely
only
it is
still
a
repressed
me
wanting
to
be
free
.
I am still looking
for the key...
.......

Sunday, February 17, 2008

Monday, February 11, 2008

choose...wisely


so many perfumes
so many different types
of expensive fragrances...
so many to choose
but what is most important
is
to know
the best perfume
in this world
is
the smell of love
that was shared
that was given
that was expressed...


an early valentine wish to all of you :)

Sunday, February 03, 2008

Blanket....for IF


Mrs OddChin (was Mrs BigMouth a few years ago before her remarriage) and
Mrs BigHead are rivals in the community sewing class...
Usually, Mrs BigHead's creations are much better, much finer compared to Mrs OddChin's.

One day, however, the class were given a project
to sew the best blanket they can think of
and the grand prize is a Cintiq Tablet
(till today, it still remains a mystery, why they choose to give away an illustrating tool in a sewing class.....hmmmmm)
And so, both Mrs OddChin and Mrs BigHead went home and sewed and sewed and stitched and stitched....from morning till night.
Mrs BigHead was very confident that she will win, knowing that all these while, her works are better then Mrs OddChin....

But

what a surprise she had on the day of submission!
Out, from Mrs OddChin's bag, came the most BEAUTIFUL TINIEST patchwork blanket ever seen in the world!

It was so beautiful, so fine, so exquisite, so magical...that it seemed to emit a golden glow!

so

Mrs OddChin was announced the winner! (and brought the Cintiq home to collect dust)

Mrs BigHead were no longer seen in the class after that day....and was very soon forgotten..

The End

(looks like i really do have time today! :D)





Friday, February 01, 2008

Leaving....to stay on....

(I've posted this sketch before...sorry...i don't have time to even sketch lately..)
Have I shared with you how i became a Graphic Designer,
from a Private Secretary? Maybe later….
Have I shared with you how I started illustrating? (not designing)…
maybe later…
But I would like to share with you now
that i have finally handed in my resignation letter last week....
after almost 8 years....

I think i am a late starter...
I wouldn't say 'late bloomer'
because, I don't think I've really bloomed - art-wise i mean...

In fact, I don't really know if I've come to an ending or the beginning...

why God choose to let you experience certain things only at a certain time
answer your prayer at a certain time...if at all, if that is also His will....
I can only quote my father's favourite phrase:
G.O.K - God only knows...
but I guess, we will all know why,
maybe soon, maybe very much later...but we will definitely realize someday,
it is only a matter of time...
and i'd like to believe that it is for our own good...if it is not answered…
it might take us some time
to accept
especially if it is something that you are so passionate about...
and at this point,
I still do not know if my will is His will…..
And if it is not,
I do not know if I can handle it
Seeing dreams of others realize
While I am still struggling….to improve…

I received this email this morning from a fellow colleague from a subsidiary in another state, after she received the news of my resignation….

"Hi Constance,
Remember I wanted to ask you something on Thursday? Well, I know that you are very busy these two months, trying to clear your workload but if you have the time, can you please draw a "cartoon" pic of me .... and if you have the time, of MR Z and MR J too?
If you don't have the time to do so before you leave M, you can do it AFTER you leave the company. It's not urgent.
This is so that I can look at the pic years from now and remember you (ha!)
Thanks :-) R"

It is a very simple request, but still simple words means much more to me than flowery ones…
It almost brought tears to my eyes…not only because of this request, but for the memories that came flowing back to me of my earlier days with the Group….those great bosses I’ve worked with, who gave me the opportunity, the chance….crazy workmates of past and present….

But it is time to leave….

to give myself a breather,
and although I will be very much poorer…
and friends and relatives might not understand,
I hope I will be happier….

I’ve not sing for a long time
I think today, I will sing again
in the shower :)

Saturday, January 05, 2008

2nd oil painting - work in progress


a little peek
of my 2nd oil painting in progress...very early stage this is...

I don't usually do this, posting work in progress...
but I guess
I'm a little nervous
tomorrow,
I'll be teaching again
after a year's break...
and this time,
it will be older kids....
oh my goodness...